I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
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