i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
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