I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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