just survived the first fart of the relationship.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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