You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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