I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Randomize