Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
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It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
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So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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