don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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