Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Randomize