Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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