Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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