the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
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