whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Please don't give away my fajitas
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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