my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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