It was confusing and full of hummus
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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