well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize