So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize