The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize