talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
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