Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
i need to put some appletini on your dick
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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