Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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