Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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