at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
My penis needs a shock collar
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize