Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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