Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize