my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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