He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
babies were throwing up all over the place
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
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Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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