I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
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I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
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We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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