Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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