forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize