I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
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what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
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all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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