oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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