Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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