I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
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