We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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