Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
You are a genius and a whore.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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