i think my mom watched the whole time
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
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