yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize