And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
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