I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
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you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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