Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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