i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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