We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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