i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
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