I can't watch pbs sober anymore
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize