Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize