The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
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