Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize