booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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