Welp...herpes.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize